Wednesday, May 25, 2005

The Gonzo Strikes Back

*Follow up to “Indecent Proposal”. Warning – Sexually Explicit Matter.

First off, I got my “alcoholic horror-scope” from Spanky’s Blog so if you want yours go check it out.

ARIESImpulsive Aries people like to party and sometimes don't know when to call it a night. Their competitive streak makes them prone to closing-time shot contests. They're sloppy, fun drunks, and they get mighty flirty after a couple tipples. Getting Aries people drunk is a good way to get what you want out of them, should other methods fail. Aries can become bellicose when blotto, but they will assume that whatever happened should be forgiven (if not forgotten) by sunrise. They can be counted on to do the same for you -- so long as you haven't gone and done anything really horrible to them last night, you sneaky Gemini.

I can totally agree that I do not know when to call it a night. Why just last night I was chillin at the bar and I got up to leave but I ended up buying a round of shots and meandering around for another 30 minutes, chatting with random mates. Forgive and forget? I am not too sure about that, but once an apology is made then hell yes. And I NEVER give a drunken person a hard time about what they did the night before. I hate it when people come up and say, “oh dude, you wont believe what you did last night. You puked over the whole pool table!” I don’t find it necessary. Its over and done with so why make your buddy feel like shit. In any case I am sorry for all the bad things I have done to any of you during one of my binges.

Last night was pretty mellow though as I have no more partners in crime left in JKT, except for Gonzo of course. But that dirty bastard left me stranded once he got a booty call from the hot mama. I gave him everyone’s feedback and he decided to take it to the next level. He told me they had been exchanging SMS all week, flirting and being naughty but he also admitted that he was a bit freaked out. I told him to get online and read the comments on my blog, but Gonzo isn’t the reading type. For me to even suggest to him about blogging his experiences would be a pure waste of time. Now I am going to list the SMS’s that he forwarded me. Some of this is not pleasant so if you are easily offended then bugger off. These all came in yesterday. His replies were obviously in between the messages but I don’t have those.

1. I am going to ---. Wanna meet me? We got unfinished business right ;-)
2. Don’t know, that’s why I’m asking you if u want to see me this afternoon, or u’re 2 scared to finish what we start?
3. Where & when big boy! I’m going shopping now. Thought I can get a room around ---.
4. Too late I got to be home at 9 and I want 2 go 2 -----.
5. Hehe, whatever u say chicken boy. I got a room in ---- this afternoon if u r interested.
6. See me then, --- said that ----- is nice hotel. I am shopping my money off. I rather have u fucking my head off.
7. I got this itch for you that I cant scratch on my own.
8. What time? Should I get a room or we just wait 4 next time? Paaaaaaaack pack pack pack…
9. In ---- having a massage.
10. Hahahahaha, very funny big boy, she’s massaging around my bum so don’t give me any ideas.. I might start fantasizing you.

Gonzo showed me these yesterday evening when we met and I asked him to send them all to me so I could blog them. I wanted his messages too but the shy cunt would not show me. I am sure he said some pansy lovey-dovey shit or something really perverted. And check the way hot mama teases him calling him a chicken. That must have triggered something in him cause he obviously asked where she was right after that. Like he was gonna run over there and prove he is not a chicken and he can take care of business. There is another SMS he just forwarded me in which she says what a great time she had last night and she also goes on to say some pretty freaky stuff that I do not have the balls to even put up here. I was surprised to see him at the bar in the first place because the lazy fuck rarely ever comes out. But I guess he was just motivated!

We spoke on the phone for a while this morning and Gonzo told me that he had some of the craziest monkey sex he ever had in his life. He said that hot mama had some “special vortex pussy” (those were his words) with super muscles inside that she could contract and squeeze. I have personally heard about this before but never experienced it. Women from Manado are notorious for having this ability. And from what G said, it was pretty amazing. Ill have to take his word for it. Honestly, I find the whole situation kind of freaky. Details? Sorry mate, can’t do that, G man does not kiss and tell. All he did say though was that he out did himself and his legs felt like jelly all the way home.

I spent the evening on my own, drinking but not being able to get drunk, missing all my friends who have left Avi here by his lonesome. Hope you bastards find your way home soon. I should also mention that Monday night went off at ZEN! All the brothers did show up to represent and that is why they were all burned out yesterday. I will be heading out again tonight as I am part of a new pool league playing for My Bar. I doubt I will make a run for the best drinking team trophy again but I will rather take this competition seriously. But considering the fact that Wednesday night is wet T-shirt contest night at May Bar, I suspect my game will lack focus. Hope to have some pictures for you tomorrow.


Rishi said...

wussup Avi, who the hell is this Gonzo guy, do i know him? You need to get some more info out of him and share the love... some of us are living vicariously thru him :)

Shan said...

ROTFLOL - yeah man, I want more info! Hehehe. Sounds like some very kinky play going down in Jakarta town.

AmitD said...

tell Gonzo to keep rockin baby!!

Avi said...

Gonzo sends his regards and reminds you to prictice safe sex.